; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
