ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
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