We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
and you fell through a lawn chair
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
