nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
