yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
