Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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