We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
