I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I checked into jail on foursquare
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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