she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
