have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
