he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
