Porn is love you can see.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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