Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
