So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
