Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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