is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
