Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
