I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
