I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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