i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
