I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
