I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize