That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Dear god my vagina.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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