none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
3pm strippers are depressing
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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