Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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