and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
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