The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
