You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
