PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
