So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
