the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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