Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
