I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
not ubering you a puppy
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
