Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize
