If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
