Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
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