Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
