you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
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