And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
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