dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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