idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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