Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
