come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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