If i come over, it means nothing
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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