when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
