Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
