Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Randomize
