i barfeds in our rink
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
