I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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