I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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